MORE MIND-READERS
Sir.—The Zancigs, I believe, claim to be able to read the mind. They are not alone in this accomplishment. The other day I happened to tread inadvertently upon the toe of our curate. I am a heavy man, and Mr Barlam suffers from corns. He made no comment, but I chanced to catch his eye at the moment, and something seemed to tell me just what it was he wanted to say.
T Heavistone
Sir.—While on duty in Palace Yard during one of the recent Suffragette disturbances, a woman rushed towards me with a hat-pin. She said nothing, but somehow it was borne in upon me in a flash that her intentions were unfriendly.
13 X A1 (in hospital)
Sir.—Ordinarily my powers of mind-reading are not large, but on Boxing Day for some reason I became wonderfully intuitive. Several men, including the postman, the butcher’s boy, and a telegraph boy, called upon me, and though none of them did more than smile and touch their hats, I read their thoughts immediately.
Householder
Sir.—The other night I found that I, too, was gifted in much the same manner as the Zancigs. I am an actor—my friends tell me, a very fine actor. On the night to which I refer I was interpreting the role of Hamlet, when suddenly, as I was in the middle of the Danish Prince’s great speech it was as though some telepathic communication had been established between my brain and those of my audience, I knew, I say I knew, that they did not like my acting.
Histrion
PS.—Only three hit me.
Sir.—I am ten years old. My brother Bob is thirteen. As a rule he gives me a pretty hot time: but yesterday afternoon, as I was sitting reading in the dining-room, he came up to me and, putting a hand on my shoulder, said. “Hullo, old chap. What are you reading? Anything good?” At that moment I had a curious feeling of certainty that father had said that he wanted something fetched from upstairs.
Little Willie
Sir.—It is four and a half years since I moved in Society to any great extent, as I have been down in Devonshire for a protracted period, and the news of the day takes some time reaching me. I have only just heard of Mr and Mrs Zancig, and I write to say that I anticipated their methods by four and a half years. That so long ago as that I was climbing out of a window one night carrying a sack full of silver, when I noticed a policeman watching me. I said, “Good evening, constable. I am doing this for a bet.” At the same time some inward voice seemed to tell me that he did not believe me. Later, I found that I was right.
W Sykes (Dartmoor)
Sir.—Though not a great conversationalist, I am exceptionally intelligent, and : I see now : abnormally so, for I have the power at times of reading what is in people’s minds. The other day I was calling on a lady of my acquaintance, when, after I had been there an hour and a half, I observed her look hastily at the clock once or twice and yawn slightly. Instantly, or fairly instantly, it flashed across my mind that she was wishing that I would go.
Social Pet
Sir.—I am rather a clumsy man, and last night, while dining out, I happened quite unintentionally to jerk my soup into my hostess’ lap. She protested that it did not matter, but I was conscious all the time of a curious feeling that she was not speaking the truth.
Diner Out