The Books of To-day and the Books of To-morrow, October 1905
 

CANDOUR
IN ADVERTISEMENTS.

(‘Youth, twenty, seeks situation. Abstainer. Mentally, rather dull.’

The Church Times.)

CABINET-MAKER, unmarried, desires continuance of favours from public. Good at repairing cabinets. Fair golfer. No settled convictions. A child in most matters.

YOUTH, rising sixteen, seeks situation as Premier. Willing to found new party, if required. Mentally, rather bright, but cheeky. Looks young, but is growing a moustache. Would change views, if necessary.

CHINAMAN seeks situation on South African Mine. No previous experience, but expert with knife. Has killed three men and wishes to extend connection. What offers?

ANCESTRAL BOGIE will give services in exchange for Home. Formerly at Glamis Castle, but dismissed as too thin and feeble. Cannot do anything, but sounds mysterious. Would suit young couple starting life in suburban flat.

RISING YOUNG NATION wishes to get rid of Peace, foisted upon it as bargain. Would exchange for campaign with European Power. Peace of no use to owner, who wishes to get rid of it at a sacrifice.

RUSSIAN DIPLOMATIST requires complete disguise to enable him to avoid interviewers. Would accept pasteboard nose. Failing this would like to engage services of competent Tutor to teach him not to tell the Truth on important occasions. Owing to defective education cannot tell a lie.

BELGIAN MONARCH would be glad to hear of some good book which would tell him something about the Congo Atrocities, of which he hears people talking, or would like to chat on subject with authority. Would give in exchange views on modern French stage.

SHEEP, which has had experience in The Prodigal Son, seeks more important part—if possible, in comedy of manners. Baa-ing part essential. Personally instructed by Mr. Hall Caine. Would be glad to hear from Managers. Dresses well on and off. Strong character actor, or comic bus. Abstainer.

 


 

Printed unsigned; entered by Wodehouse in Money Received for Literary Work.